Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
