I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Come see our sink grown plant.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
