So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
