fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
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