Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
i came on her dog
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
