lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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