I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
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