Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms