One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
