just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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