i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
