oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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