Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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