i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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