:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
You need Xanax blowdarts
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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