Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
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She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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