You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
