In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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