Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
