I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
