Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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