So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
