Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
