so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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