I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Randomize
