I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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