My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
