the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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