she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
