Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
