some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I will be naked everywhere
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
