I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
she looked like the before picture.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize