Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
