You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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