How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
