We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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