Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
