I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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