Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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