it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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