I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
