just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
