Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
