is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
