I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
