yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Randomize
