i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I had to cum in my sink.
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