I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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