I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
