OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Randomize
