Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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