Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize