I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Randomize