My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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